The Adventures of Queeny Podd
by im-n0t-0kay-ok
Summary: Queeny Podd is not your average man, you see, he's a nail artist and he had a very big secret. Mrs.Hatett is involved with that secret. Queeny's lost his lover, and this is how he lives. Mindless story. Rated T, for my awkward wondering if it's okay.


**Okay, so this is something I came up with, I thought it would be funny but not sure. I'm gonna wait and see if anyone would like me to continue this. It will sometimes go by the movie, but sometimes it shall not. I'm actually gonna not go by the movie that much because I can't really remember everything from the movie and it's gonna be difficult to watch it all and then type this or yeah. :P It's most likely not gonna go by the I'm NOW gonna STOP my blabbering and yes.**

**Oh and I don't own Sweeney Todd and anything else real that happens to be mentioned here. O.O**

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"QUEENY! OH, QUEENY!" yelled an annoying voice, that distracted the very attractive nail artist from his costumer.

This was Queeny Podd, and he was the very famous nail artist of Street, Street.

"Excuse me, mam. I shall be right back." Queeny excused himself, running his hand through his blonde hair, pulling that damned black streak of hair back into place. He really needed to brush his hair!

He walked downstairs and jumped to the bottom step and on the floor. "What is it, you vile woman?" Snarled Queeny looking at , who was finishing sewing a very ugly dress on her table.

"Why must you speak to me like that, Mr.Q?" Sell-A-Door Hatett asked the man she loved, he had gotten locked away a few years ago, on a charge of stealing a lollipop from a baby. He got locked away to the worst place of all… Fun Smiles Land, BadLamb, of Australia. It was the worst punishment of all. An amusement park! With games and rollercoasters, and stuffed animal prizes. Oh, the horror Queeny had faced.

She brought him into her shop and let him do what he'd done best, a nail artist. She needed help with her business. But there was a secret no one knew. Where she got her clothes from. Her ideas? Where? Well, Queeny had helped her. He had been driven mad about something horrible of course. But that tale would be for later. How he helped her? He had helped her by squirting nail glue into peoples eyes and killing them with an acrylic nail remover. Hatett would take their clothes after washing them of course, and she would cut up the clothes and put them together in a dress.

Queeny had no idea why her dresses were very famous, after all, they were hideously abnormal, and badly matched. Queeny did not understand when people had come to think that red matched with purple, and grey, and sea foam green all together. It made no sense, and Queeny had a very hard time doing peoples nails when they had been dressing in Sell-A-Door's dresses.

It didn't even take a therapist to know that Queeny was a very broken man. His beloved was dead, dead, buried in a shoe box out back! Yes, a shoe box! She had always been in one of those magic tricks where she fit in a tiny box. Well maybe it was because she was only 4'2 in height. Her Name? Juicy. Juicy had died of heart break when Queeny was taken away on account of 'False charges', and her daughter, ShowAnna was taken away by that evil, wretched, Llama Breeder. His name.. Well everyone called him Llama Breeder Pimpin'. Of course, that was his name. Pimpin'.

The day she had died was the day when Queeny walked right through that door. She was crying, looking out the window. And then when Queeny saw her crying, he went for the door, but she had fallen dead before he got a chance to call her. No one ever did understand how ugly, little Juicy, had snagged gorgeous Queeny. Juicy was very, very, ugly. Queeny always said her eyes were the most beautiful brown he had ever seen! But her eyes. They were almost black and sometimes in the sunlight they were ugly, shit brown. She'd horrible blemishes on her face. And she had the body of a 10 year old! But as people always say, there's sometimes beauty on the inside. But with Juicy, it was not true. She was very rude, to everyone. She complained all the time. Even her organs were ugly. But beauty is just an eye to the beholder. Sell-A-Door had said she was only like that because she was a ginger. And gingers have no souls.

Enough about Juicy. Time to get back to the story. "Because, all you do is annoy me! Mr.Q that, Mr.Q this! ARE YOU SERIOUS?" Queeny roared at Sell-A-Door.

"MY NAME IS NOT SIRIUS, MY NAME IS SELL-A-DOOR!" She yelled back, hurt that he had even called her a different name! How dare he?

"I do not recall asking your name, Hatett. Watch your tongue with me!"

"Mrs.H!" Yelled a boy with the face or a very serious Labradoodle.

"Yes, Bow-be?" Asked the seamstress.

"May I take off my costume now? This is very uncomfortable, and I'm not quite sure people would find me appropriate to be acquaintances with." Said that boy, scratching his face with a very messed up hand.

"Yes, Bow-be, we're closed now. Just don't go upstairs please. Mr.Q still has costumers." She smiled, looking around for said man, but finding he had left, the young boy reached to his side with a messed up hand unzipped a costume, his costume had fallen down and revealed a mystical unicorn.

His blue tail swished back and forth before settling where it should have been.

"Bow-be. Did you just let one rip?" Exclaimed the disgusted woman, covering her nose.

"No!" He exclaimed.

Bow-be walked towards a book and put his whole face (If you could call it that?) in a book and giggled again, "Look! Mrs.H! I'm Facebooking!"

"What in the world is a Facebook?" Asked Sell-A-Door, staring at the boy strangely.

"I dunno! Something about a net of inters, and communicating with people fastly! Makes no sense, sounds stupid but I think it's cool!" He smiled.

"This boy is retarded!" Queeny yelled, walking down the stairs.

"HE IS NOT!"

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**Okay, that's all Im doing for now. Reviews make me happy. And yes this will get way funnier after this chapter. I just felt like introducing everything about the characters and stuff. Anyone has any questions about how to pronounce the names, or anything else, ask me. C;**


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